WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S. PRESIDENT, DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN, GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?                          
                                                                                                                
                                                                           
My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of Iraq regime has been  completed.  Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our Mission in Iraq is complete. This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq. This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now to begin the reckoning.                                                    
                                                                           
Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short. The United Kingdom, Spain, Bulgaria, Australia, and Poland are some of the countries listed there.  The other list contains every country not on the first list. Most of the world's nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening.              
                                                                           
Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war.                                                                
                                                                           
The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world Hell-holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.  Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic?   Call France!                                
                                                                           
In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth. Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France, or maybe China.                  
                                                                           
I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France, Germany, and Russia. Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well. Bon chance, mesamis.    
                                                                           
I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York!

A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not pissing us off for a change. Mexico is also on List 2. President Fox and his entire corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. Because of calling a halt to the Iraqi war, I will have a couple extra tank and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put em? Yep, border security. So start doing something with your oil.                  
                                                                           
Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty - starting now.  We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we'll be drilling for oil in Alaska - which will take care of this country's oil needs for decades to come. If you're an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you to List 2 above: pick a country and move there. They care!     
                                          
It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, "darn tootin."  
                                                                
Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is time to eliminate hunger in America. It is time to eliminate homelessness in America. It is time to eliminate World Cup Soccer from America.
 
To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thanks guys. We owe you and we won't forget. To the nations on List 2, a final thought: You might want to learn to speak Arabic.
 
God bless America! Thank you and good night.  If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading it in English, thank a soldier.

AMEN.

Just a couple edits cf…



Spain pulled their troops over a year ago and Bulgaria followed suit last December. But that’s ok, it’s just more money we’ll save when we cut off foreign aid.

The really good news is that Israel will be on the top of list 2. We give more money to them than all other countries combined.

I love the idea.

The only bad news is that it will still take at least 30 years to get back all the money we blew on Iraq. That and the fact that over 2,500 American soldiers died unnecessarily. Unfortunately, there's nothing we can ever do to change that.

We tried that approach already. The result was WW II. We almost waited TOO long before we bothered caring about the rest of the world then. Let's not repeat that mistake.

Sorry cfulmor we usually agree on things, but I can't do it on this one. As nice as it sounds, that approach just doesn't work, IMHO.

Besides, I'm a Soccer fan.

Don't listen to BMIC. What does he know? I'm with you on this one cf.

There are just a few other minor fallacies…

Except for these Third-World Hell-holes who have been part of the COW from the beginning.

Romania, Fiji, Kazakhstan, Macedonia, Estonia, Bosnia and Herzegovina, Armenia, Slovakia, Czech Republic, Lithuania, Latvia, Republic of Georgia , Albania, Mongolia, Azerbaijan, El Salvadore, and the Republic of Korea.

And in regards to our neighbors to the north…



Not quite right.



Which brings us to another important point you made that I agree with totally.



Does the name Osama bin Laden ring any bells? We didn’t exactly hunt him down did we? If I’m not mistaken while we’re screwing around in Iraq, he’s still on the face of this earth and we know where he is. But while we’re starting to quietly pull out of Afghanistan, the Canadians are finishing our job for us.

But other than that, I’m completely in agreement with you on World Cup Soccer and the UN parking tickets thing. They seriously p!ss me off!

PS: If you find this hard to believe, thank George W. Bush.

Ok, Gents, point of clarificatioin. I am not the author of the "speech" posted. I received it in an email and wanted to see what different viewpoints I would receive. As ususal I am not surprised by the responses.

Now for my take.

This part is true. Do I want to see an immediate withdrawl, HELL NO. But my friends across the aisle want to "cut and run" which is sad, very sad.




The list is much longer actually I saw many foiegn troops while over there. To many to list here, but the Koreans come to mind. Spain was there so they get the joys of being on the first list. As far as list two and Israel, (no, I am not ANTI - Sematic) I think it is time to cut some of the funding flowing to Israel.

Good idea, as long as we don't revert back to the horrible welfare state of yesteryear.



Cut ties with France that's for sure. Germany we need to keep good ties with in my opinion. That mostly comes from enjoying the country while I was stationed there. So sue me I'm sentimental. Russia on the other hand, still a growing democracy and we need to keep an eye on all those nukes they still have.

This just makes me sick. Talk about taking advantage of our hospitality!!!! Tow 'em boys.



Good idea but impractical. The ACLU will be all over this one like stink on Poo.



NAFTA was a sham anyway. Again we have been taken advantage of. Oil from Alaska, woohoo, aboutdamntime. Enviro types see bolded statement.



Soccer?!? Couldn't care less.

There you have it enjoy. My take on it. I think this is the longest post I've ever done. Now I need a beer.

Great thread cf. Seriously, I enjoyed it. I knew you weren't the author though. Aside from the fact that it's outdated, i.e. Spain and Bulgaria. Plus my father-in-law sends me emails like that all the time and I think I recall reading it a year or two ago. If that wasn't enough, the last sentence was the give away. I mean, what other language have you been using here? But it was a good study of how things can change.

The amazing thing is that I actually agree with you on the following, in no certain order:

1. I think it is time to cut some of the funding flowing to Israel.

2. Redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home.

3. Good idea, as long as we don't revert back to the horrible welfare state of yesteryear.

4. Germany we need to keep good ties with in my opinion.

5. Russia on the other hand, still a growing democracy and we need to keep an eye on all those nukes they still have.

6. NAFTA was a sham anyway.

7. Oil from Alaska, woohoo, aboutdamntime.

8. Talk about taking advantage of our hospitality!!!! Tow 'em boys. NOTE: I'll include Washington DC in that one.

9. Soccer?!? Couldn't care less.

The only things we don't agree on are "diplomatic" relations with France and an immediate pull-out from Iraq, so we actually have much more in common than not.

Unfortunately, that last one is non-negotiable with me.




PS - You should do longer posts more often.

I'll try to keep that in mind. See what a couple of college classes do for a 40 y/o. Makes him think he's smart or something. The best part is my dear Uncle Sam is paying for them all. :-D

I had no intention of arguing the last point, you have made yourself quite clear on that one. I'll just politely disagree.

I'm now, officially, in the "cut-n-run" crowd when it comes to Iraq. The WMD fiasco aside, I had always hoped a worthwhile reason for the sacrifices in Iraq would be the stablility in the area that would arise from a representative government in Iraq. I thought the people of Iraq would embrace their new freedoms, just like Eastern Europe did over a decade ago. Boy, was I ever wrong.

Iraq (and, IMO, the Arab world) is not ready socially, politically, or educationally to accept democracy and its associated freedoms, so it's time to leave them to kill each other until another brutal dictator rises up and rules them as they apparently need and, in my opinion, deserve. THis seems to be the only way there will be stability.

I'm sorry if that comes off sounding cold or heartless, but I've had enough over there.

I disagree B, while the country was in a basic isolationist pattern, during the beginning of WWII, we were not completely out of the picture. We were arming the democracies of Europe, albeit on a cash and carry basis. We got burned during WWI with the "Allies" when we ended up forgiving their debts after the war. Now could the Europeans and Russians handled the Axis by themselves without our involvement, who knows. Japan took care of that for us, when they cowardly attacked us. Even after Japan attacked, most Americans wanted US to get Japan then MAYBE worry about the Europeans. Most Americans got mad with the "Germany First" policy adopted by the allies.

Great rebuttal - NOT! Borders on becoming a personal attack, but the Mods aren;t likely to do anything about it. But it's certainly NOT a rebuttal of my opinion - it's an insult. By the way I know a lot, but my intelligence is not the subject of this thread. If you want to refute my opinions, then please stick to refuting my opinions instead of insulting and attacking me personally.



IMO it's a matter of degrees. While I'll grant you that the majority of the suggestions in your post sound like good ideas, I would just caution about thinking we can go very far in the isolationist direction. It "feels good" but IMO we need to be careful about not letting our dissatisfaction with the rest of the world lead us too far in the isolationist direction.

And thank you for answering my points instead of disrespecting and ignoring me as suggested by Idiot.

Don't listen to me B. What do I know?

Oops! It's a good thing I'm not a mod or I'd have to ban myself for personally attacking me.

You know B, you've finally convinced me that evolution isn't true. If it was you'd have a sense of humor by now.

A snippet of a news blurb that caught my eye.

World Bank chief attacks US over falling aid Mon Jul 31, 4:38 PM ET

WASHINGTON (AFP) - World Bank president Paul Wolfowitz strongly criticized the US government for scaling back its aid to a bank development program that helps some of the poorest countries.

The former US official said it was "deeply worrying" that President George W. Bush's administration had cut back its contributions to the bank's International Development Association (IDA).