I'm getting ready to lose it people. I'm so angry right now.

I had a 401k with my employer from THREE years ago. I rolled the money into a different account, but I kept getting statements saying I still had 42 bucks in it. I rolled it over again one year ago. I'm getting statement with $1.99 balance now.

Here I am a THIRD time doing this. I was at the website reading the instructions, (I previously just called my old employer and they "handled" it). The website says I'll be charged a 50 termination fee. So I call them ask, "wtf?" That's ridiculous and how are you going to take 50 bucks out of my 1.99 account? "We'll give you a negative balance and your account still will not be closed."

Excuse me? You're going to charge me 50 bucks to terminate my account and then NOT terminate my account? Did you charge me 50 bucks the last TWO times you supposedly terminated my account? THEY DID! They charged me 50 bucks the two previous times I tried to terminate my account. WHAT. THE. FRICK.

So ADP blames my former employer. They said that by the time the paperwork made it to the 401k people, the account had already accrued more money SO instead of calling me or someone else to adjust the amount on the form, they charged me 50 bucks, rolled the amount from the form and kept the accrued interest in the account thus not terminating it because it had a balance!

OHMYGOD. Seething. I'm seething.

It's not like nobody could contact me the last two times to make sure this went through correctly because they make me divulge my entire life on umpteen different forms. They have all my numbers, my emails, my goddamn underwear size.

Bitches.

Drink a beer. Punch your pillow. Calm down. Call them, ask for a Manager. If they have half a brain, they will fix it and refund your money. If not, call the regulatory agency -- probably the Securities and Exchange Commission.

Snoop

I don't have a pillow nor a beer. I'm at work!

I'm going to go chain smoke and drive like a lunatic instead.


Just kidding.

Mostly.

No lunatic driving! We want you to be safe.

You can't possibly be this concerned over a $1.99.

I'll tell you what if you give me your address I'll send you the $1.99, I would hate to see you start chain smoking and end up with cancer for a lousy $1.99.

It's not the monetary value of the 401k account that bothers me. It's the 100 bucks in termination fees that they charged me when they didn't terminate my account AND getting pamphlets, updates, newsletters, quarterly statements and all sorts of mail from them year round. I shred anything with my account and personal information on it so I have to open up the crap mail all the time. This account is just a loose end that I can't leave dangling out there. It bothers me that there is no closure.

Like Moms said before, I'm an anal virgo/only child.

Incompetent people.

They now swear that they only charged 50 bucks once, the first time. AND they were wrong when they said 50 bucks would be applied to terminate the account at 1.99. They've now assured me that my account will be closed and dormant, not accruing anything with no 50 dollar charge. They said they'd put a note in the account that I'm not to receive any mail.

So basically my 1.99 hangs out there in space forever which I still think is dumb, but at least I have a chance to forget it now.

I spoke with several women at the company several times yesterday and today. When I asked to speak with a manager today, I asked if it was the same person I had spoken to several times yesterday and today. They said no, but it really sounded like the same woman each time. I asked for everyone's name and got a different name each time. They gave me the names Lynn, Debbie and Jenny. They all had accents which to me sounded like middle eastern accents. My previous employer told me that the company was outsourced. They are prolly not their real names.

To recap: they ensured me that they would consider my account dead with no accrual and no mail to me.

Now, only two months later: received yet another statement in the mail for more accrued interest and I'm now at $2.10 balance.

:there is no emoticon for my current facial expression which is good because it's very ugly and disgusted:

Few days later I get yet another piece of sunshine from the mail person. In so many words, "we're distributing your account balance to you and you will be responsible for any tax 'notices.'"

Can anyone out there please help me find a way to legally say, "you can stick MY $2.10 up your ass?"

I don't want to get hit with a tax penalty that's larger than my "distribution" because they don't care to "handle" my menial account after my numerous, frustrated attempts to handle it my goddamn self.

Legal way would be get a lawery.
Seem that this has be going on long enough.

Got dat right, girlfriend.

Sounds like you're going to get a $2.10 check.

Deposit the check and forget about it.

I serious doubt the IRS is going to be concerned about the tax on your $2.10.