He's wearing pumps!


Looks like Condi has already been there. HAHAHAHAHA

Look Shit for Brains, there is already a Political Humor section.


Mods, please move this to the appropriate area.

uhhh.... patton... it IS in "Political Humor".

oops... maybe the mods already moved it....

No they didn't. Bushavenger is confused.

you know... bushavenger... funny... and this is NOT directed at patton, but. if you add a "k" to the end of that... and pronounce it somewhat phonetically, it becomes even funnier.

Sorry-they're cowpoke boots...hes a texan y'know..

Ok... so what's that thing under the sheets that Barney's looking at?

Unlike most on here, I will admit my mistake.

Do you have anymore Idiot, that one isn't all that funny.

That's the problem with Bush jokes, maybe that's because most of the time the joke's on us.


Btw, I changed the titled of the thread, Bush jokes seemed redundant.

See what I mean Ud?

You might like this one...


In the light of all the criticism that George Bush is a moron, the Republicans decided to hold a "George Bush Is Not Stupid" convention. Since Trent Lott is retiring and can't lose votes for appearing with Bush he agrees to emcee the event.

Lott begins by saying, "We are all here today to prove to the world that George Bush is not stupid. So ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce President George Bush."

After the cheers die down. Lott says "Mr. President, we're going to prove to the world once and for all that you are not stupid. So tell us, what is 15 plus 15?"

Bush, after scrunching up his face and concentrating real hard for a moment, declares, "Eighteen!"

Lott shook his head in disappointment and the 80,000 Republicans start cheering, "Give Bush another chance! Give Bush another chance!"

So Lott says, "Well since we've gone to the trouble of getting 80,000 of you in one place, I guess we can do that." So he asks, "What is 5 plus 5?"

After nearly 30 seconds of chin-rubbing and grimacing, Bush meekly asks "twelve?"

Now Lott is quite perplexed, looks down and just lets out a dejected sigh -- everyone is disheartened. Bush starts pouting, and suddenly the 80,000 Republicans begin to yell and wave their hands, shouting again "Give Bush another chance! Give Bush another chance!"

Lott, unsure whether he's doing more harm than good, eventually says, "Ok! Ok! Just one more chance -- What is 2 plus 2?"

Bush looks down, counts on his fingers, and after a minute, proudly announces "Four."

A moment of total silence, Lott's eyes open wide in shock, then an electric charge surges through the stadium as pandemonium breaks out. The 80,000 Republicans jump to their feet, start to wave their arms, stomp their feet and create a deafening roar:

"GIVE BUSH ANOTHER CHANCE! GIVE BUSH ANOTHER CHANCE!"

Much better

Still pretty f'ing stupid.



S*** for brains.

What do you expect? Consider what we have to work with.






We're always looking for new members... our idol... www.s***-for-brains.org

Gettin better, keep it up

Yes, but here's your President

Your Pres

BWAHAHAHAHAHA.

Sorry to disappoint you but I voted for HW. Little did I know that W would come along and make even dukakis look good.

I don't get it.

Go figure

From this weeks The Onion

Bush Vows To Make It Up To Country Somehow

February 27, 2008 | Issue 44•09

WASHINGTON—Amid allegations that his thoughtless and insensitive decisions have damaged his relationship with the nation, President George W. Bush vowed Monday that he would, starting now, "make everything better."

"This time I'm serious," Bush said. "I am ready to make a fresh start if we can just put the past behind us. I promise."

An estimated 35 million citizens listened to the president's televised remarks while silently crying behind locked bathroom doors.

Though Bush told all Americans they owed it to him to give him one more chance, he admitted that there was no excuse for his mishandling of national affairs.

"Things have just been so crazy at work lately," he said.

During the 14-minute address Bush acknowledged that he and the country had drifted apart. He accepted some of the blame, but stressed that it was partly the American people's fault, and went on to chide them for not giving him an opportunity to explain, not standing behind him, and failing to understand his "very real" need for unchecked executive authority.

"My job is stressful," Bush said. "Trust me, things will calm down in a few months once I don't have to deal with it anymore."

The president, whose approval ratings have dropped steadily in recent years, said he had no idea how bad things had gotten until he found out that an overwhelming percentage of Americans didn't even bother responding to an opinion poll this month about his recent $3.1 trillion budget proposal.

Bush has since taken steps towards reconciliation with the American people, including promoting a promise to help alleviate the fiscal woes the U.S. has faced in recent months. Bush said he knew that the $300 he intended to give to every citizen "couldn't possibly make up for how [he has] governed," but nevertheless asked the nation to have faith in him.

"I know it's not much, but it's a start, right?" Bush said. "And it hasn't always been bad. Doesn't this remind you of that other $300 rebate I gave you in 2003? You always forget all the times I'm a really great president. We have really had some wonderful moments."

"Cut me some slack here, for Christ's sake," Bush continued. "I'm trying. I really am."

In addition to providing economic relief, Bush said he has taken other measures to strengthen his bond with the nation. According to the president, his newly proposed warrantless-wiretapping bill will greatly broaden the reach of his personal attention to the American people's needs and put him in a position to be more directly involved in their lives.

The president concluded by imploring the nation to help him rectify the situation, stressing that he always has America's best interests at heart but cannot be expected to improve things all by himself.

"You have to realize that everything I do, I do for you," Bush said. "Do you think I like denying health care to underprivileged children, or plunging the country deeper and deeper into debt? Well, I don't, and I hope someday you'll understand that. In the meantime, I'm asking the American people to try to meet me halfway on this."

Despite Bush's seemingly conciliatory stance, public response to Bush's promises has been frosty at best. Cato Institute policy scholar Brian Whitaker echoed the sentiments of many Americans, calling Bush's recent overtures "too little, too late."

"We want to believe that he's finally going to be the president we always wanted, but we've given him so many chances," Whitaker said. "I don't think we can handle another disappointment. Maybe it's time to realize that President Bush will never be the head of state we need him to be."

"Then again, maybe our expectations are unfair," Whitaker added. "He seemed so sincere this time. He wouldn't abuse his executive powers if he didn't care about us, right?"

Whitaker predicted that the nation will likely move forward and try to forget Bush, though it may be difficult for Americans to ever trust a president again. He said the current crop of presidential contenders offers little in the way of an alternative to Bush, but maintained that "at least Barack Obama listens to us."

I realize this is satire, but he's such a jerk.

Like the brain-damaged POTUS-dude said to the Austin-American Statesman in November 2000, "If you don't stand for anything, you don't stand for anything!"

Duh?

Only 328 more days to go folks - HANG ON!

Hee--gotta love The Onion!

Anybody have a good Bush joke for this thread?

Remember you asked, ducks for cover:

Iraq vs. Vietnam
Q. What's the difference between the Vietnam War and the Iraq War?

A. George W. Bush had a plan to get out of the Vietnam War.
.............................
Three Brazilian Soldiers

Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed."

"OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!"

His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands.

Finally, the President looks up and asks, "How many is a brazillion?"

Late-Night Jokes About President George W. Bush From 2006
"President Bush made a number of gaffes at the G-8 Summit. One of them -- he gave a neck rub to the Chancellor of Germany. So you know what that means? He's drinking again." --David Letterman

"The chancellor of Germany disengaged herself from the president of the United States using a move she learned in a woman's safety class. ... If that was Clinton going in for Merkel, somehow her bra would be off." --Jon Stewart, on Bush groping German Chancellor Angela Merkel

"A lot of people were offended by President Bush using a four-letter word at the G-8 Summit the other day. Were you offended? I was more offended by the way he eats a buttered roll in front of company." -Jay Leno

"White House press secretary Tony Snow says that when President Bush was told he was recorded saying a four-letter word, he rolled his eyes and laughed it off, which is ironic.
Bush & staff are now reacting to himself the way everybody else does." -Jay Leno

"A few weeks after U.S. troops dropped two 500-pound surprises on al-Zarqawi, the White House dropped a 190-pound surprise on U.S. troops in the form of a presidential visit. Said the Iraqi prime minister to the president, 'If I knew you were coming, I'd have built an infrastructure'" --Jon Stewart

That's more like it.

thanks Udmas, once I started i was having fun

Come on guy and gals, join in. I want to hear or see some jokes.

BUSH,,,, Isn't that the joke. OH I'm gonna pay for that one aren't I?

"All I can tell you is when the governor calls, I answer his phone." --George W. Bush, San Diego, Calif., Oct. 25, 2007

"More than two decades later, it is hard to imagine the Revolutionary War coming out any other way." --George W. Bush, Martinsburg, W. Va., July 4, 2007

Bush Presidential Library

Here is the layout for the George W. Bush Presidential Library.

The Alberto Gonzales Room - Where they erase your memory.

The Hurricane Katrina Room - Still under construction.

The Texas Air National Guard Room - Where nobody shows up.

The Walter Reed Room - Where they don't let you in.

The Guantanamo Bay Room - Where they don't let you out.

The Weapons of Mass Destruction Room - Which nobody has been able to find.

The Iraqi War Room - Where they force you to keep going going back over and over again.

The Karl Rove Gift Shop - Where you can either buy or steal an election.

The Men's Room - Where you could meet a Republican Senator (or two).

Hope this hasn't been posted yet...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pa3J-L29iT8...feature=related

What a shame.

Ok, Modsquad, time to do your job.

This entire thread (minus this post) needs to be moved to: http://www.herald-mail.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=3958

We don't want dupication now do we? Hopefully someone else will point this out also, since the Modsquad is biased against me.

Yoss, would you care to make the recomendation.

Pat, keep on rattlin' that cage!

Good to see you back in fighting form.

Since you're bringing me into this, I don't see your point? Bush Jokes, Hillary Jokes are all subsets of Political Humor. We just need Obama Jokes, McCain Jokes and Huckebey Jokes (oops, that's redundant).

f-ing hilarious...

Will Ferrell couldn't even do a better job than that!

The point is there is already a Bush Humor Thread. That was the name of the Thread the link took you to, if you bothered to clickie it.

Oh you're right... I'll use the report topic button.

Of course I am, now if you will just remember that, things will be fine.

Well unless I'm missing it, there is no Report Thread button on the average Joe's screen.

There is a report post, is this what yhou are talking about?

yeah, whateveh....

And good morning to you too, sunshine.

Bush lives forever.