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I’ve been hit hard by the economic downturn in recent years.
My 401k has lost so much it’s more like a 154c.
And do you think The Herald-Mail’s sports-hack-in-chief has offered me a pay raise recently? Please.
That guy’s so cheap he washes his paper plates.
So, I’ve had to take steps to save money wherever I can.
Gas prices are so out of hand that I have to pawn part of my collection of Natrone Means football cards every time I need to fill up.
Milk is far from free anymore, so I went ahead and bought the cow. Meanwhile, LuSydNa still wonders why I don’t want to get married.
Heck, I’ve even resorted to only washing my shorts on even days.
That’s not so odd. Washing them on odd days would be odd.
But I realize I’m not the only one who’s struggling to keep his head above water.
Have you seen Koelble’s record lately?
I read that the U.S. Postal Service was cutting services in an effort to stay in business, but I’ve noticed quite a difference in what I’m now getting from my mail carrier.
Last week, he had a certified letter for me. The postman rang my doorbell, but only once.
I had to sign in triplicate for the letter, but I had to write my name three times to do it. And I had to use my own pen.
I stood there at my front door opening the envelope, which had “Special Delivery” stamped on it, and the words “not so” scrawled before it.
I then realized the carrier walked away with my pen.
“Wait!” I yelled.
The mailman stopped in his tracks.
“Oh yeah. Wait a minute, Mr. Postman!” I shouted.
He looked back at me.
“I’ll give you 30 seconds.”
On with the predictions. Last week 15-6 (.714). Season 90-37 (.709).
HIGH SCHOOLS
South Hagerstown 34, Catoctin 13
Brunswick 45, Williamsport 24
Boonsboro 30, Hedgesville 7
Berkeley Springs 41, Clear Spring 33
Chambersburg 37, Carlisle 18
West Perry 44, James Buchanan 14
Shippensburg 27, Greencastle 16
Martinsburg 47, Patrick Henry 20
Keyser 35, Jefferson 14
Musselman 27, Hampshire 22
Skyline 42, Washington 21
Northern 34, Waynesboro 12
Hancock 36, Hundred 19
North Hagerstown 41, Smithsburg 23
Blair Academy 24, Mercersburg Academy 17
Flint Hill 39, Saint James 20
COLLEGES
Virginia 24, Maryland 21
West Virginia 44, Texas Tech 27
Shepherd 34, West Liberty 13
PROS
Ravens 23, Cowboys 16
Redskins 31, Vikings 28
Steelers 20, Titans 10