The Times' NBA rankings

1. OKLAHOMA CITY (32-8)     Playing Clippers before Lakers this week is like taking on varsity before the JV. (1)

2. CLIPPERS (32-9)
Paul, Griffin to Lakers counterparts at All-Star Game: “Funny seeing you here.” (2)

3. MIAMI (26-12)     LeBron James leaves rest of NBA feeling 20,000 leagues under the sea. (4)

4. SAN ANTONIO (32-11)     It’s hard to beat Spurs with that beast in the frontcourt. You know, Tiago Splitter. (3)

UNICORNS FROLICKING IN THE BROOK

5. NEW YORK (25-13)     Knicks polish off afternoon tea before scarfing down Pistons in London. (5)

6. GOLDEN STATE (24-15)     Team policy of muffling injured players has Lane Kiffin’s seal of approval. (6)

7. MEMPHIS (26-13)    Focus can go back to ribs instead of ribbing after three-game losing streak ends. (7)

8. INDIANA (25-16)      Nowheresville team could have a pair of All-Stars in Paul George and David West. (8)

9. BROOKLYN (24-16)     Condolences to statistician Herb Turetzky, who worked 1,200th straight game. (13)

10. ATLANTA (22-18)      Lou Williams’ knee injury is anything but sweet for already shorthanded Hawks. (9)

A SPRINKLING OF FAIRY DUST

11. CHICAGO (23-16)      Fantasy players can continue to dream about Carlos Boozer blocking shots. (10)

12. DENVER (24-18)      Making only 68.1% of their free throws, Nuggets seek tips from Dwight Howard. (12)

13. HOUSTON (21-21)     You have multiple problems: A) Defense. B) Turnovers. C) Free throws. (11)

14. BOSTON (20-19)     No need for an SI players poll to know Kevin Garnett is one unpopular dude. (15)

15. PORTLAND (20-20)     Trail Blazers’ season quickly going from a feel-good story to never mind. (14)

PAGING SIDD FINCH

16. MILWAUKEE (21-18)     “Strange Brew” was still in dollar theaters last time Bucks won in Phoenix. (16)

17. UTAH (22-19)      As usual, Jazz find energy, solutions in a crowd-bolstered home win over Heat. (17)