Listen, my children, and you shall hear of a “messed up” tale of Paul Revere.
The tea party movement’s obsession with the American Revolution wouldn’t be so risible if its supporters would read some history before they rewrite it.
Recently, Sarah Palin made a gaffe about Paul Revere, then made it worse by defending her mistake.
Those who remember their grade school history know that Revere, a Boston silversmith, rode to warn the American revolutionists that “The British are coming!”
Speaking at a Revolutionary War landmark in Boston, though, Palin said Revere warned the British — that they had better not try to take away Americans’ guns.
She was right about the Redcoats coming to confiscate weapons and ammunition. That was because the American militia were in open rebellion against the government. But it wasn’t why Revere rode that night. And unless he was trying to get himself shot, he probably wasn’t ringing any bells.
On Fox News, Chris Wallace offered Palin a chance to correct her mistake.
“You realize that you messed up about Paul Revere, don’t you?” he asked. But Palin wouldn’t admit it.
“I didn’t mess up,” she said.
She conceded that Revere did warn the Americans the British were coming, but his other purpose, she said, was to warn the British that “you’re not going to succeed. … You’re not going to beat our own well-armed persons, individual, private militia that we have. He did warn the British.”
“I know my American history,” she insisted.
Apparently, she does not. But she knows her political base, which includes gun nuts and anti-government fanatics.
Her answer makes it seem she also may have even been reaching out to the patriot militia movement — those private armies that are preparing to save us from what they see as the “tyranny” of the federal government.
What I want to know, though, is who will save traditional conservatism and our country from Palin, Ron Paul, Michelle Bachmann, Herman Cain and other misguided revolutionaries.
Limbaugh tea: 100 percent unnatural
Just when you thought the Paul Revere stuff couldn’t get any stranger, along comes talk radio blabbermouth Rush Limbaugh with his new marketing effort, Two if By Tea.
Limbaugh is releasing his own brand of tea party-themed, bottled sweet tea just in time for the Fourth of July.
In his mission statement for the new brand, he warns: “The liberals are coming! The liberals are coming!”
He also explains that his product represents American values of capitalism and excellence and is an attempt to capitalize on the “tea party trend.”